Information on romance scams and scammers.

#190466 by Dotti Sun Feb 09, 2014 12:20 pm
If you are receiving email from anyone claiming to be in the military using an address, then you already have your answer. He is a scammer.

If he claims to be a soldier stationed overseas, and he asks you to request ANYTHING for him or fill out ANY military forms, he is a scammer. (The military doesn't allow outsiders to make requests on behalf of soldiers, or fill out beneficiary forms.)

If he has asked you to contact a satellite phone company to set up communication, then he is a scammer.

If he has told you that he is a soldier but he cannot access his own money for ANY reason, then he is a scammer.

But in general, if you post a little background on the story, and the first few emails the scammer sent you (you can just copy and paste the contents into your post), we will be able to help you to identify whether someone is real or a scammer.

Need to post photos?
Are you a victim of a romance scam? Read here for advice and FAQ's.
#190468 by linda74espi Sun Feb 09, 2014 12:50 pm
Hello there,

The way I found out was by researching military information. Once I knew the facts and compared them to what he was telling, it was as clear as night and day what the truth was. Your heart wants to believe so bad, but you have to be strong and listen to your own logic. Take a deep breath, stand back, and analyze the whole situation as an outsider. If for one split second you have some doubts about him, then theirs your answer! You just have to be strong enough to head the warning signs and walk away from him.

That's exactly how I handled it. To me it became a game of the wits. I challenged him by throwing it out there that I knew the truth and I boldly told him not to expect any money or for me to sign any type of forms, because it was never going to happen! I heard back from him one more time, but when I didn't reply back, he knew his game was up and I haven't heard from him since.

I'm okay, the world still has its color and life! You'll be okay as well. You just have to believe in yourself.

Take care and you can always find support on this site!
#190966 by sblair Fri Feb 14, 2014 1:46 pm
this week i have been scammed by a man call ed steve jerry , i met him through badoo dating site and we made friends on facebook when we chatted all day, he said he hd falling in love with me, he was a captain in us marine corps in afghanistan, he was widowed with 2 kids, he wanted me to pay £500 for secure call connection and had to send email to militarybaseland.uscom , and they sent me details to pay in to a barclays bank account of the name of anthony abugueto, i kept emailing stating i want to pay through paypal for my protection nd they said i had to pay directly in to bank or western union or money gram, i refused, as western union and bank both refused to except my money warning me to go to the police and report it as it looked suspicious. so i did evenually after 3 days of constant emails from steve asking me to pay the fee, he was very two faced in emails saying he loved me , and when i delayed and called his bluff for proof of his us army rank details he got angry very nasty then would reply again saying if i loved him i would do it, he played with my head, (remebering all this time he said it was prohibitted to use the web out there and he was using a small local boys phone to email me,i started getting very suspious when us army emails statrting threathing me to pay up or the would get me in to trouble, i went to police and filed a case.i now have deleted all email addresses used, changed and blocked my facebook account as he had an accomplice on face book clled jack higgins said he worked in the us military care home where steves kids were. please be aware , i have recently done a search on his email address which is [email protected] and found it list on 71 dating sites and facebook sites so please beware of this man as the photo he sends is very attractive.
#190967 by linda74espi Fri Feb 14, 2014 2:08 pm
Wow, it's ridiculous, they have no shame! You handled it lovely though. Take care and remember, ask for concrete evidence that they exist. A short video for instance and you pick the topic to talk about on the video. If they come up with excuses to not do it, their a scammer! Of course they can't because it would reveal their true identity. So stay smart and remember your worth a lot. If he doesn't think a short video is worth his time, then he's basically saying, "you're not worth it." Who wants to be with someone like that? Not I...
#190969 by sblair Fri Feb 14, 2014 2:24 pm
i recently put a post on my facebook page with his photo to warn any of my friends as i m ex army and had lots of advise from ex army and currently serving members who told me something was not right, as english forces can use web, skype, facetime, :laugh-s:
#192101 by wagonwheel Sun Feb 23, 2014 11:05 am
Hi Everyone,
Well i will cut to the chase and say i have been well and truly scammed good and proper. I am too embarressed to say the amount but just glad i found this site when i did. I fell for a guy on Zoosk back in December; his name is mentioned in a couple of the emails i have read under Romance scams - Captain Lloyd Jordan Jones of 30th Space Wing and the other name he uses is Lloyd Mee or Lloyd Honey - 3 facebook pages under 'Mee' and one under 'Honey'.
The addresses he gave me where [email protected], [email protected] - names that where given of his provessing officer and a another are Lt Col Roy James and Major General Gregg A and to top it off he actually sent me flight details of an actual flight with KLM - Kuwait-Dubai Dubai-Amsterdam Amsterdam to LHR. I was sent alleged court documents for me to sign and return - saying i was his fiance. I had an email outlining his benefits when he got out and i will tell you it was impressive.
I have at least 5 pics of him and the one i love the most is off his military pic where he tells you he is a Captain but looking at the badges in the pic the rank is Lt. Col (asked an ex RAF to confirm) - sorry forgot to mention that he allegidly is a pilot in the US air force on a peace mission in Afghan, no phone but has called once - the number that came through was 07539 512574 - when you ring this number there is a ladies pre recorded voice saying please leave a text message and the receiver will pick it up - no way was i gonna do that.
I sent money through Western Union and I have since spoken to them to report the agent who picked up the money - Oyo Oje from Cairo Egypt or Ann Stoddard Scotland Uk. I can rabbit on and on - apologies but so annoyed with myself. I am going to collate all the information, emails,pictures etc together and report to the Fraud Agency. I know i wont get my money back but hopefully i will feel alot better.
Many thanks for this site just wish i went with my gut instinct and looked for this earlier.
#192102 by sblair Sun Feb 23, 2014 11:17 am
i must say they are very good nd preying on woman like this, everyone falls for a soldier, i was just so lucky that my western union branch wouldn't except my payment, not would barclays bank , so congrats to uk for this , i have filed a report with police with emails, bank names, pics etc so they are aware of this now, they are scum using forces personel like this as i am ex army and think it is very cruel.
#192994 by rozxs Mon Mar 03, 2014 1:38 pm
Dear Madam,

                  From the office of North Atlantic Treaty Organization(NATO) here in Malaysia..We re here to bring to your Notice that the request for a leave for the bearer Sergeant Larry Burns has been re hereby ask from the office to pay for the Leave Form, the Sum of $500 US dollars for a Leave Form to the Branch Headquarters  in Indonesia through any BANK near to you in your Country and forward the information to us..The Leave Form will be send to your Email address after You might have payed for the leave form.

Account Name= Lailani Nunung

Acct Number= 2820100888110

Bank Name= CIMB Bank

Swift code=BNIAIDJA

Bank address= Jln. Jendral ahmad yani normor 83, indonesia

Branch address= Balikpapan ahmad yani

Bank code= 022

Branch Code= 282

Owner address= Jln, Anggrek 11 no 27 rt 14 balikpapan utara, indonesia

Thanks for your Co-operation

Commander Frank Williams

*this was send to me when I e-mail the commander who was frank Williams via his email [email protected] and Lucas Burns is the sergeant who contacted me.. Is this fraud?? Necause he was telling me they cant leave because they're in Malaysia for NaTo??
#192999 by Dotti Mon Mar 03, 2014 1:49 pm
It's 100% scam.

You are not talking to a soldier. You are talking to a young, pathetic worm who makes his living using stolen photos and fake names to steal money from people who are looking for love. The writing tells me he is African.

You will NEVER have to pay for ANY soldier to get leave. You will NEVER request leave on behalf of any soldier. The minute someone tells you that you need to do that, you can be certain he is a scammer.

In addition, I see typical scammer nonsense here. NATO does not have an army. NATO is an alliance of countries that each have their own military forces. NATO coordinates missions, but individual soldiers still serve in their countries' military forces. An American soldier on a NATO mission would be part of (and would report to) the US military. A British soldier on a NATO mission would report to the British military. NATO has absolutely nothing to do with individual soldiers or their leave.

Need to post photos?
Are you a victim of a romance scam? Read here for advice and FAQ's.
#196720 by a-r Mon Apr 07, 2014 6:30 pm
I've been in contact with Lt Dwain Benson from US Army on facebook. We have exchanged over 400 messages between us. He is extremely romantic, sweet talking, I'm the love of his life, soul mate. He said he wanted to come and visit me, that he wanted to meet my family, my friends, and for us to plan a wedding after he is out of Afghanistan. He is a widow of 4 years, has a son 7 years old at home in California. He said that to be able to get a leave from Army, I would have to e-mail the army using [email protected] address.
The mail was answered following:
We are pleased to notify you that your request has been acknowledged by the United States Department of Defense.

Attached herewith, is the Transit leave form for 1Lt Dwain Benson of Bagram Airbase North of Kabul,Afghanistan.You are requested to fill the form to the best of your knowledge and return with a copy of payment slip within (3) working days for further processing.

However, you are required to confirm the payment of the refundable sum of One Thousand Five Hundred and Fifty Dollars ($1550) which covers the processing fee and Notary Stamp charges.

Note that the leave process would not go any further if the criteria given are not met.

Please make payment to our Logistic Officer in California, the details are as follows:

Mode of Payment: Western Union Money Transfer
Receiever's Name: Steven L Anderson
City:6th Ave Victorville,California
Country: United States

Best Regards,

Sgt.Cox Clarke
US Defence Dept.

No, I did not send money. But I was sad, because even after I question him about him being hoax, he was able to convince me that it was not. Well, now I know better.
I have reported him to facebook as a hoax, but his profile was not taken down.
And now I find this
#197603 by CharleneYoung60 Tue Apr 15, 2014 5:54 pm
I have been corresponding with a man called Robert Clements, he is supposed to be a Staff Sargent in the Army and is in Iraq. I have been suspicious since beginning to talk with him. He used the language of the scammer right from the beginning at times, he wanted to "read" from me, called me "my dear", a lot. Have not been able to find out where he is from and all of a sudden he calls me, phone number is not listed, comes up as restricted, has a very definite accent and when I mentioned it, he could not get off the phone fast enough. Now he wants to send me some money (that is a change, lol), wants to do a fund transfer directly into my account. I don't feel good at all about this, because then he would have my account information and would be able to withdraw money from my account. He is very good, makes you feel as if you are the most wonderful woman in the world. Used pictures of an American soldier. I have not sent him any personal information other than e-mail, and am not going to. I have had about 20 scammers to contact me, have gotten pretty good at recognizing them, all of them from dating sites with Christian Mingle being the worst one. It is bad that these people are using our soldiers for this stuff. I hate that.
#197610 by CharleneYoung60 Tue Apr 15, 2014 9:22 pm
I can only speak to the male type of scammer, since I am female, but they have a definite pattern in the way that they function. I have purposely gone on several dating sites because I have been compiling some information on male scammers. I have found that when they contact you on the site, and you answer them, their profile often disappears immediately. I guess this is so they cannot be traced and when you click on them again the site tells you that they are not available. They always want you to go to an off site place to talk, Yahoo Messenger is a favorite. They don't call often, they like to text more than talk on the phone. They will e-mail, but don't do that too often either, as their IP address can be traced and that will tell you where they are e-mailing from. Notice their stated location and then notice their area code on their phone (if they give it to you, or when they text) it, won't match with their stated location. Notice the way that they talk, the language that they use, they always want to "read " from you, they use My Dear often, and often say "will want". Once you are aware, you will pick up on the bad grammar. They fall in love very quickly, and are adept at pulling you into their lies. They are very often Engineers as an occupation, often have only one child and are widowed, seldom divorced, but once in a while you will find one who says he is divorced. That only child is usually anywhere from 13-24, and either lives with him or with his parents. He will have an accent, will say he was raised in another country to cover the accent. They steal their pictures from other people on the dating sites that they go on, and will even steal their profiles. I was talking to two men at one time who had the same pictures. One was real and I could tell the difference. The other one was not real. Their e-mails will sometimes read different, will read like it has been copied, and guess what? It has been, there are sites that they can go to and cut and paste poems and love letters, one guy sent me one that was evidentially meant for a man, lol. Did not read very close. I talked with one guy who had come up with a way of showing a video on his web cam, he did not count on my noticing that the video was the same every time and when I asked him to touch his nose in the video and it did not happen, he would not show it to me again. How dumb did he think I was??? I guess I must fit the profile for the "mark", widowed, retired RN, no children at home, lives alone. I have talked with 17 since last January. I am currently working on a handbook to help women to avoid the heartache that comes from dealing with this lowlife. Be smart, be alert. They are everywhere, and they want YOUR money. Oh almost overwhelmingly, their favorite color is blue, don't ask me why. And they "BUZZ" you on Yahoo, lol. I hope this helps someone.
#197613 by Dotti Tue Apr 15, 2014 10:13 pm
You are absolutely right that many of these scammers follow the same pattern--basically they have a formula that works, so they stick with it. It's good that you are educating yourself. You can actually see many of the points about basic scammer profiles here: viewtopic.php?f=13&t=3607

Posting each scammer's information-email address he is using, photos, first messages to you (some of the most likely to be recycled) can be a tremendous help to other potential victims.

But, just to clarify a few points.
I guess this is so they cannot be traced and when you click on them again the site tells you that they are not available.

Deleted dating site accounts has nothing to do with their traceability. Scammers know that their profiles, like their email addresses, are frequently short-lived. That's why many try to pull you off the dating site almost immediately. When a scammer sets up a new dating profile, he will typically approach as many targets as possible, as fast as possible--so you can be sure that he approached dozens of other women before or when he approached you. When the profile disappears, it is often because (a) one or more of the other women he targeted reported him for scamming or (b) on a paid dating site, he used a stolen credit card to sign up, and the site discovered the fraud. Unfortunately, standard policy on most dating sites is to simply delete the profile without warning the people contacted by the scammer. Occasionally, the scammer will delete the profile on his own to support his scam, but more often than not it was deleted.

They will e-mail, but don't do that too often either, as their IP address can be traced and that will tell you where they are e-mailing from.

IP addresses can be traced, but it is extremely easy to get around that and most experienced scammers are quite capable of disguising their location while using email. Some scammers do still stick with email. The primary reason so many do like chat is so they can accelerate the "relationship." The faster they can get the victim to believe she is in a real relationship with a future, the sooner they can get to the money request. And when she has spent hours on chat, the victim feels like she has invested much more and is that much more committed.

They steal their pictures from other people on the dating sites that they go on,

Sometimes. They also steal from facebook pages, modeling sites, sites for aspiring actors, and even news stories and wikipedia.

I was talking to two men at one time who had the same pictures. One was real and I could tell the difference.

I would be very careful about this one. While the English is frequently poor for scammers from Nigeria and Ghana, there are exceptions. And scammers from South Africa, while less common, often have excellent English. If one scammer is using the photos, it is highly likely there are other scammers using the same photos, and the odds of the second person with the same photos also being a scammer are much higher than average.

If you are researching scammers, I hope that you are not using dating site profiles or yahoo accounts that are linked to your real identity. That would not be playing safely. We have more information at our sister site,, on safety when baiting scammers.

It's also important to point out that while the approaches are often very similar, not every scammer is the same, and many scammers vary from the "norm" in one way or another. I want to reiterate this, because when given a set of criteria that defines a scammer, some victims will convince themselves that their "love" is real because he doesn't meet all of the criteria. The only thing we can say with certainty is that every scammer will ultimately get to the money, though it may take a while.

Need to post photos?
Are you a victim of a romance scam? Read here for advice and FAQ's.
#197729 by CharleneYoung60 Wed Apr 16, 2014 9:56 pm
Thanks Dottie, those comments helped a lot. On the post that I did about robert clements, what is the scam there? He was wanting to send this money, could it be money laundering or what? Could I not get in trouble if I accepted a large amount of money like that? $325K, or so he said. I thank you all for all the information we find here. I do have quite a list of potential scammers who have contacted me, all from Christian Mingle but one, and that was Zoosk. What can I do with those names to help others avoid them?

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