Information on romance scams and scammers.
#43730 by lovelife2011 Wed Jan 05, 2011 5:42 am
Hello,
I really need advise here, I have been talking to this guy from Nigeria for about 5 to 6 months now. We started off as friends just talkin on and off then we started talkin about being together. Not anytime soon but thats the plan if things are for real. Everday we would talk for hours I would say like 6 to 7 hours aday. He never ask for money which I dont know if its good or bad that he has not, but people told me that he might just be taking his time to ask. Anyway I have saw him on cam many of times so I know he his real. My worried come into play is that I really have feelings for this guy and I dont want to be the next scame victim story when it could have been stop before getting to far. So I ask myself maybe I need to dig a little more deeper to really know if this guy is real what he feel. Maybe this could all just be a scam, but he is smart at what he do. I begin to ask myself all these question, what if things are real to the point I want him to move here or something like that. I have nothing bad to say about him because he has been nothing but a sweet guy to me. He is really a good guy, funny, playful, likes to talk about really open minded. My fear is just following in love with someont I thought I knew, but wasnt the person or all this just being a waste of time no one likes to waste their time with games you know. Plz I am askin for help. :?:

if there is any info needed plz ask :!:
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#43734 by Chris Fuller Wed Jan 05, 2011 6:26 am
Hello lovelife2011, and welcome to ScamWarners.

It is good to be cautious about anyone that you have 'met' online.

It is sensible to google their name, address, telephone number, email addresses - and advisable to also google distinctive sentences from their first three or four emails, plus their expressions of love - to see whether you can spot any phrases commonly used by scammers.

Also, please read:

Are you falling for a love scammer?

which gives guidance on some other signs to look out for.

It is correct that some romance scammers can wait many months before making a request for money; they believe that you are more likely to send them money if you have been writing to them and trusting them for a long time. Bear in mind also that their 'reasons' for needing money may seem very believable, and even verifiable (eg visa fees, the cost of flight tickets). Nonetheless, please do NOT send money to anyone you have not met in person, however genuine they appear, and even if they communicate with you on webcam - scammers also frequently use webcams, so seeing a person this way does not prove that they are not a scammer.

It is also wise to consider that internet access is proportionally very expensive in Nigeria, and the ordinary worker may not be likely to be online for six or seven hours per day. Also, international relationships are very difficult to bring into reality, and often it may turn out to be impossible for either person to live in each other's country.
#43742 by GomerPyle Wed Jan 05, 2011 8:10 am
Does the person claim to be Nigerian or someone from the USA or UK ?

Has he told you he is wealthy ?

Has he given you a phone number ?

There is nothing wrong in checking someone out lovelife2011. If the person is Nigerian he should be well aware of the reputation his country has for scammers.

As Chris says, a smart scammer will spend a lot of time 'cultivating' a victim before asking for money, and understand that I never gave my wife cash before I married her, so there's no reason why you should ever pay someone you only know from the internet any money. Only scammers believe that falling in love over the internet means you can convert that love into cash. Someone who loves you won't ask for money. They'll put love ahead of their need for money.

Non-EU citizens should go here to find out about obtaining a visa to work as an au pair in the UK
http://www.ukvisas.gov.uk/en/doineedvisa/
Whenever payment is requested by Western Union you're dealing with a scammer
#43762 by lovelife2011 Wed Jan 05, 2011 3:01 pm
Thank you both from replying back to me.
Well I have google his name and email before and old websites he use to be on came up, but everything was the same as what he told me. I dont know his address I never ask, but I will today for sure. He never said he was wealthy and he is in Nigerian for sure. I have his phone number which I call him alot on or text. Is there away I can check to see if he is a scamer :?:
#43807 by lovelife2011 Thu Jan 06, 2011 8:31 am
I have his info if anyone needs it..I know theres no real way to know if he is a scamer until he makes his moves. I am just tryin to prevent it from happening. I found this site realy useful and saw other ppl names and info on here I talk with in the past and I have no ideal they where scamers. GREAT WEBSITE THANKS :oh-joy:
#43812 by GomerPyle Thu Jan 06, 2011 9:19 am
Internet reltionships are very different from real life ones lovelife2011. There may never be any chance of it turning out to become more than just an internet relationship, in which case truth is never the most important issue. If there is a hope on either side of it becoming more, then truth is an important factor and the likelihood of it working out is low, but that's life. You have to learn to enjoy the relationship without committing yourself too deeply, whether your partner is a scammer or not.

Of course the greater problem is that Nigeria has such a bad reputation for scammers. Why not raise the topic with him, and i don't mean make an accusation, but just ask him about the problem. It sounds possible that he isn't one, and how he responds to the issue might give you a clue about him. It also acts as a warning if he should happen to be a scammer.

We know very well that not every Nigerian is a scammer and I have come across Nigerians who have been scammed themselves. It's easy to spot a scammer, but not so easy to give someone who's honest a 'clean bill of health' as the best ones will hide their ultimate intention.

It's not your fault to be suspicious. Romance scammers exist and if there weren't thieves and burglars you wouldn't have to lock your front door. Any real man who cares would understand your concerns.

Non-EU citizens should go here to find out about obtaining a visa to work as an au pair in the UK
http://www.ukvisas.gov.uk/en/doineedvisa/
Whenever payment is requested by Western Union you're dealing with a scammer

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